I am very much a positive person when it comes to looking on the brighter side of life, and what not. But I seem to have hit a wall.
I wouldn't say that I am 'depressed' again - I am just having a hard time trying to stay upbeat about me and my body.
Weight issue aside (because you all know how I feel about that), I don't understand how I can get better when no one knows why certain things are happening inside me...ok, yes, I am under investigation again, but at a snail's pace. And the snail is asleep.
At least before when I'd be a bit down about the whole thing, I knew I had a scan/appointment/consultation around the corner and we were working towards getting me better.
But their lack of urgency is even more apparent with the appointment letters I got through this week. My surgical follow up appointment is for December. My cat scans are in the middle of July and my gastro follow up is near the end of August. Great work.
I really don't want to have to get more poorly before someone does something to help?!
I guess I feel like I did before I was diagnosed with Crohn's; I know things aren't normal and despite what the medical people say to me, it's not making a blind bit of difference. When there's a fundamental problem with my body - especially my digestive system - whatever I do right now, isn't going to change anything.
Which is why I am in the middle of moving hospitals on the hope that whoever I see next will be able to help me out...
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